You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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