This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
