the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
