Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
this hospital has no fireball
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Randomize