just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
please come you make the beer taste better
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
