Is it normal to miss your booty call?
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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