We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
