mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
