: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
