We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
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