And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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