Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
