marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize