at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
