Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I still have a little drunk in my system
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
