3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
We're like a lot better than the average bears
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
