There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
This couple is walking their pig around campus
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
