seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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