Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Alive.
So much puke
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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