So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
