he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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