then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
