HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
