Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
