just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize