WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
