So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
