I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize