I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Randomize
