Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
