can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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