Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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