had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
How's work?
Spinning.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
