I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
