He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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