yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize