ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
