need another drink. this is the easiest way
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
