I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
