okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize