I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
My bed smells like the plague
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
