Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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