i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Come see our sink grown plant.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
