do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
that's an acceptable place to lick
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
