Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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