Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize