woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize