he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
