This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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