I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
