you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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